A few weeks ago, I was drinking a delicious latte from the place that Dave Ramsey refers to as "Fivebucks". I looked down at the lid, studied it for a moment, and received an unexpected bit of wisdom. I saw the words "Solo", "Traveler", "Caution" and "Hot". My overly stimulated mind put the words together in a new and caffeinated way.
"Caution, Solo Traveler! Hot!"
In other words, if you are traveling through life solo, you better be careful not to end up in hot water.
One of the pitfalls of relocation is the laborious process of making new friends. I have often compared it to the agony of a blind date. What if this person doesn't get my jokes? Will they think I dress funny? What if we have nothing in common?
Make new friends! Meet new people! It sounds exciting, right? But the actual process can be quite painful. I've been attending our new church for over a year now, and I haven't yet found a single person there that I would call in a time of need other than the pastor.
Last spring, a speaker came to the church. As she rambled on about her life, she made the offhand comment "If you don't have any friends, you need to get some! Friends are wonderful!" And then she went on to talk about all the wonderful silly things that she and her girlfriends do together on a regular basis.
At the time, I remember thinking "Wow. That was insensitive!"
Only someone who has lived a life with friends constantly surrounding them would make such an audacious statement. When you live miles away from any family or friends, it can be tough. Going solo is no fun. Sick with the flu? Too bad. There is no one to watch your little one. Want to attend an event but have no one to go with? You go alone, or you don't go at all.
This year, I feel truly blessed that I've made some real friends at my work place. We are a group of women that love to chat, encourage, laugh, cry, and just spend time together. We swap stories about our kids. When one of us is sick, we cook for that person and call on that person. We pray for each other and show care and concern about the minutiae of our lives. In other words, we do church.
Yesterday, I read these words in Acts 14: 21-22 : "They preached the good news in that city and won a large number of disciples. Then they returned to Lystra, Iconium and Antioch, strengthening the disciples and encouraging them to remain true to the faith."
We are all travelers. The road isn't easy. But when we walk it together, we can encourage and strengthen each other. We can share stories of faith during hard times. Isn't that good news?
P.S. You know what the red cup means? Holiday coffees are back! Peppermint Mochas, Gingerbread and Egg Nog Lattes! Can you hear the music? It's Handel's Halleluiah chorus! :) Thanks for visiting the cafe, friend!
Hi MaryRose... I found your blog yesterday as I was surfing around. Came back to look a bit more today and found this post about friends and/or the lack of them! LOL!! Don't even know why I'm responding to it other than to say thanks for sharing your thoughts. I've never been much of a "people person" so have never had a lot of friends no matter where I've lived and I have moved across the country a few times. But, the past ten years or so of my life have been more "friendless" than ever before. I had to give up my career due to a degenerative retinal disease. That disease has taken away my ability to drive which made me even more of a recluse than I had already been. One wonderful thing that did happen since I stopped working was that I met and married a wonderful man... but that ended up in a move across the country and as you said... it's not easy to make new friends. My husband is a lot like me in that he's not a "people person" either! LOL!! He does meet people through his work, but since I can't drive and get out on my own it has made it pretty much impossible to meet new people and make friends in my new location. You are so fortunate to have met wonderful people where you work. I'm OK most of the time with my situation of being pretty much homebound, but I do often think about what would I do if there was some sort of emergency. Family and friends live so far away it would take them a few days to get here. But, I've babbled on much too long... you just struck a cord with me as I read your blog post! I'm enjoying your cards. I call myself a cardmaker but don't really make as many as I should!
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